Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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