I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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