i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
this hospital has no fireball
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
