I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
