And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
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