it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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