i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
