Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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