fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Randomize
