I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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