I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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