He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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