so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Just invented taco cereal.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
