only if we run a train.
done.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Randomize
