You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
how can u be prego again
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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