But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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