I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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