I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
