hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
