If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
