I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
