she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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