no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
