you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Randomize
