part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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