You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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