The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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