Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
