ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I am one with the molecules
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
