Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
