idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
