Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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