Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
