I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
