as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
