Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
