Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
