check it out our google latitudes are spooning
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Randomize
