End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I'm at about main and main street
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
