we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Randomize
