I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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