did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
