I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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