I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
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