Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Randomize
