bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
