sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
