My hand turned me down
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
