I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
