My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
