Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Randomize
